I met a girl today she was really like my ex girlfriend, had the same moves with hair and stuff like that and i just felt like I knew her, I didn’t talk to her when I saw her she was just sitting in a corner, looking at her phone and stuff like that, I was a bit jelous cause I didn’t have battery on my phone and that sucked, maby I’ll see a post about her next time, when I try to find her I always get a dead end, but today was like seeing a fucking angel, like she was an angel I never saw her like this before, When I was with her, I was very jelous but today it felt like I was handcuffed and couldn’t do anything, there were alot of people there and I couldn’t get jelous on somebody I don’t even know, but date, It was really stupid seeing that figure again, but I missed that look like it was the most precious thing I had, and her moves I didn’t hear what she said to the other guy but It felt so fucking stupid for him to talk to her and I watching them do that, It was like damn that’s another guy talking with my ex girlfriend even tho she wasn’t my ex girlfriend, so I couldn’t do anything but I swear if I have a girlfriend I’ll protect what is mine with everything I’ve got I’ll make anyone pay even tho it’s not they’re fault
It’s like a vengeful spirit within me, I feel like doing some pretty dumb shit for love but , love is so stupid in every single way possible, It’s like desire when you don’t even know that person literally it’s only desire but If you know them and you feel like you known them all along, that isn’t desire anymore it’s lust or something like that, When you see a person for example and you like them and you think they are cute or something, What’s the first thing you do, you tend to go to them and talk to them but why didn’t I go today and talked to that girl, am I that dumb? but I just wanted to see her I knew she wasn’t my ex because they weren’t the same person, but If i’d meet my ex and she wouldn’t run from me like I’m a fucking maniac, I’d probably tell her, that I admire her cause she put up with my stupid manners and stuff like that cause I treated her kinda bad, but was most of the time drunk when I did that, “When I feel she’s near I just wanna grab a beer”
So I think real love makes you do some stupid akward and maby just maby fanatic things in some cases or not fanatic , just extreme meajures, but I don’t advise you guys who are reading my post to do the same cause it might be bad, It’s just bad what I did to her in the first place but I was drunk and in love and jelous and she told me she loved me for 3 or 4 moths and we had a 1 year and a half relationship, that just kinda knocked me out cause I loved her the most, and the point is i cheated on my first girlfriend and it felt really bad, so cheating is bad which way you put it and i tried to teach my second gf that cheating is bad like don’t cheat don’t drink especially don’t do drugs they are the worst, a cup of coffe and maby a book i think it’s the best cure, if you’re fucking stupid and go party all night in the club with no self discipline or control then I think you’re a moron, or a moron who thinks he’s having fun but it isn’t, so I tried to teach her to be sort of just like me in a way or i tried to make her like me but I didn’t think I could handle all the responsability cause I was like 20 years old when I met her or 19 don’t remember exact.
I think I sort of consider myself a teacher in a way cause I really like to show the way cause I try to make the best possiblechoice or way even for another person, It’s like personalizing something for someone, like a gift for example which is pretty cool cause not many people can do that so handmade stuff really should sell or something like that, or even paintings, I don’t know how to paint but I can make a house on paper I think I’m in kindergarden at painting or sketching something I really think I should try to do this but dunno if I have the imagination or even time cause In my head I could do so many things and it’s really hard to decide what to do or what could make you a better person, so I write this and get some work done later,
I’ll go share a video with you guys hope you enjoy